Did you make a New Year’s Resolution yet? Or perhaps you just set a few goals to work toward. January is definitely the month when most people decide to start fresh. Good intentions aside, how will you stick with your resolution and reach your goals?

This is especially important to consider if you’re trying to overcome a porn habit, or any unhealthy sexual habit. You will need a support system of people who care, and you will need empowering resources. A Sexual Integrity Mentor, Accountability Partner, and Accountability Software are essential, but you’ll also need to open your mind to news ways of thinking and behaving.

Set Yourself Up For Success

It takes time, effort and knowledge to change a bad habit. Pornography is a toxic form of human sexuality that rewires the brain to get stuck in an unfulfillable desire loop. You probably didn’t know that you could become addicted when you started watching porn, or how difficult it would be to stop.

Your brain needs to be rewired again, in a more healthy way. Start by understanding exactly what keeps you trapped in your sexual habit. How much has your life been scripted by what you watch? Then consider the conflict you feel and what is pulling you toward change. Use the following worksheet to clarify what’s motivating you in both directions, so you can start to rebuild your life focused on healthy sexuality and real relationships.

Mixed Motivations Worksheet


Pornography Is Not Biologically Real

There is no good porn because porn is not real; it’s not how we’re designed  to act. It’s not natural to want sex by yourself with pictures more than intimacy with another person. Even the scenes in porn videos are not real; they’re scripted, directed, acted, and often drug induced.

However, it’s easy to get trapped in unnatural habits, especially when there are plenty of people ready to exploit this human weakness. Sex is a natural desire as well as the need for love, but it takes clarity and discipline to mold our natural desires in a meaningful and fulfilling way.


Misdirected desires cause poor health and unhappiness

Compare the desire for sex to the desire for food. There’s all kinds of unhealthy food available on the market. For years we’ve been told that these products are okay, not harmful, even good for us. But now Americans face an obesity crisis because of overconsumption of processed foods, unhealthy fats and excess carbs. We lack true nutrition because we are not eating in a natural way. Hamburgers and french fries seem so much more desirable than a salad and baked salmon. Yet, which is better for you?

Changing an unhealthy sexual habit can be compared to starting a diet and exercise program to lose 150 lbs. It seems daunting, almost impossible. But it is doable with support. You need a coach, a good plan, lots of motivating information, focused effort and discipline. You will need to do some emotional work as well, to trigger your desire for what is real.


A Neurosurgeon speaks out about porn:


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