We all have a powerful need to belong. When we feel part of a group, we feel stronger. Being accountable means being responsible, liable, and answerable to others. This is a natural responsibility because we are always in relationship with others.
Don’t Alienate Yourself
Having a sexual habit can alienate you from the natural groups you belong to: your family and church community. It can lead you to hang out with people who have similar habits, and that’s not going to help you.
Finding a support network of others working to improve themselves is tremendously valuable. Check out 12 Step and other groups, both in person and online. Check out our Forum.
Track Your Actions
One of the simplest ways to practice accountability is simply recording your own progress. In this case, it is not deceiving others that you are trying to avoid, instead it’s a way to confront self deception.
How well did you manage yourself today? Before going to bed, make a notation on an app or a wall calendar. This can be as simple as a plus or minus sign (or zero if neither up or down). Or it can be more elaborate, like a dated checklist.
Monitoring progress like this can be eye-opening. Over time, you may see an overall upward movement unnoticed amidst the many ups and downs. You’ll learn that certain circumstances contribute to the habit getting better or worse, and this will be helpful self-knowledge. And just knowing you are keeping track of your progress is proven to assist in reaching goals.
- A recommended recovery tracking and check in phone app, at rTribe.com
- How to track habits effectively, at LifeHacker.com
- iPhone app for 40 day tracking of porn use, with daily inspirations, at CovenantEyes.com